Thursday, November 30, 2006

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Roxy Klein at 9:02:00 AM

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

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~Good Morning~

I just wanted to pop in and wish you a Happy Humpday!


The Boss had to fire somebody!!! He had narrowed it down to one of two people, Debra or Jack. It was an impossible decision, they were both super workers. Rather than flip a coin, he decided he would fire the first one who used the water cooler the next morning. Debra came in the next morning with a horrible hang-over after partying all night. She went to the water cooler to take an aspirin.

The Boss approached her and said:

"Debra, I've never done this before but I have to lay you or Jack off."

"Could you jack off?" she says. "I feel like shit this morning!"

Roxy Klein at 5:55:00 AM

Monday, November 27, 2006

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Happy Cyber Monday!

This is one of the busiest days of the year for online shopping! Check out MY STORE & T-SHIRT HELL for some great Christmas gifts … I’ll be adding a few more items to MY STORE over the next couple of days so be sure to check back.

I hope that you all had a fantastic holiday weekend. Ours was AWESOME!!!! We had fantastic food and Dallas WON Thanksgiving Day! There were quite a few impressive plays in that game. We took it easy and didn’t do too much after that. Sex, food and sleep!

It is extremely foggy out this morning. I can barely see 5 feet in front of me. Apparently it is going to be in the 70’s for the next few days. What the fuck is with the weather??? Which reminds me, I really want to see “An Inconvenient Truth” We saw previews for it on a DVD and it looks very interesting.

Well, I've got to get out of here for now. I have so many things to take care of... Have a great day! XOXO

Roxy Klein at 7:09:00 AM

Thursday, November 23, 2006

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Roxy Klein at 8:25:00 AM

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

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Roxy Klein at 6:11:00 AM

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

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Angry Dragon ~

While a girl is sucking you off, right as you are about to cum, you grab hold of her head and pull her mouth as far onto your cock as possible. She proceeds to gag from the cock unexpectedly being rammed down her throat, but since your cock is blocking her air passage, her cough (and your cum) exit through her nose. The cum dripping out of both of the girl’s nostrils, resembles a dragon’s snout - and after pulling a stunt like this, you can be sure she's going to be an angry one.

and if you scroll down a wee, you will see a demonstration... LOL

Enjoy!

Roxy Klein at 10:30:00 AM

Monday, November 20, 2006

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JUST A REMINDER....tomorrow, all cell phone numbers are being released to telemarketing companies and you will start to receive sales calls.

YOU WILL BE CHARGED FOR THESE CALLS.... To prevent this, call the following number from your cell phone: 888-382-1222. It is the National DO NOT CALL List. It will only take a minute of your time. It blocks your number for five (5) years.

HELP OTHERS BY PASSING THIS ON TO ALL YOUR FRIENDS OR GO TO:
www.donotcall.gov/

Thanks Chris!

Roxy Klein at 2:07:00 PM

I love this picture!

Roxy Klein at 11:45:00 AM

Brett and I overslept this morning and he was almost late for work. I hate feeling rushed first thing in the morning. Well I stumbled down the stairs and instead of going to the news right away I flipped through some channels and came by “Witches of Breastwick, Busty Cops 2 and Amy’s Orgasm….” Holy shitty flicks! What a way to wake up.

Good morning everyone, I hope that you all had a great weekend…

Not too much happen over here. We hung around the house and zoned out in front of the T.V. basically it was your typical lazy weekend. We are getting ready for Turkey Day! We’re going to spend it with Brett’s family and catch the game on the HUGE screen. Speaking of Football, Dallas knocked the Pony’s out of their winning streak! WOOOOOO WHOOOOO!!!! Great game!!!!!

I've got to get out of here for now but if you get Showtime check out “The Underground” I about fell out when the pussy’s were talking! It’s like Mad TV with Damon Waynes. Have a great day!

XOXO

Roxy Klein at 7:00:00 AM

Thursday, November 16, 2006

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Roxy Klein at 7:05:00 AM

Monday, November 13, 2006

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I think that one of the dogs just fell off the bed. LOL…. I’m sitting here surfing and I hear a big thud… I walked into the dining room and see Oliver dazed and confused. He likes to sleep on top of his crate.

Good Morning Everyone!!!! I hope that you all had a fantastic weekend.. We got great amounts of rain and wind yesterday. It apparently knocked the power out all over town and some are still without power this morning. Thank god we didn’t loose power, I think that Brett would have had a shit fit! We were watching the game last night on FOX and we must have had a bad connection or satellite disturbance because it was choppy as hell. Either way Dallas Won!!!

It’s going to be 64 degrees today and 72 tomorrow. At this rate winter will never arrive. I can’t believe that Thanksgiving is just around the corner. I am ready to cook the house down! I hope that it cools off before hand because I don’t think I could handle a 75 degree day for Thanksgiving… Well I’ve got a lot of things to get done today before Brett gets home. Have a great day!



MySpace Glitter Graphics

Roxy Klein at 8:47:00 AM

Friday, November 10, 2006

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MySpace Comments Graphics

Good morning ~

I watched Derailed last night before I went to bed… It was not what I expected but pretty decent.

For some reason I was feeling quite goofy this morning and I took it out on Brett pinching his nipples, flicking cold water at him and spanking his ass while his hands are full. (Need I remind you that this is taking place at 5:30 am) He drops everything at the front door, runs after me and corners me on the couch. He starts licking the side of my neck, squeezing my tits and goosing me … He got me so good that my hair is wet…. EWWWWWW! Fucker! When he gets back from work I’ve got little practical jokes set up all over the house to get him back! He he he heeeee…

Well, I hope that you have a fantastic weekend.. XOXO

Roxy Klein at 1:22:00 PM

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

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Happy HUMPDAY Peoples!

I hope that everyone went out to vote yesterday!

We ate a ton of pizza, got the sleepys and passed out for about an hour. Then we watched a couple of movies last night. One of them was “An American Haunting” Now I can say that if the covers were pulled off of me when I was asleep by a spirit, I would have probably shat myself and died right there. SPOOKEY!

I didn’t get much sleep last night but oddly enough I feel pretty good today. So I have a ton of chores to get done starting with my mile high pile of laundry. Have a good one... XOXO

DEAR DIARY ... DAY ONE

I am all packed and ready to get on the cruise ship. I've packed all my pretty dresses and make-up. I'm really excited.



DEAR DIARY ... DAY TWO

We spent the entire day at sea. It was beautiful and we saw whales and dolphins. What a wonderful vacation this has started to be. I met the Captain today and he seems like a very nice man.



DEAR DIARY ... DAY THREE

I spent some time in the pool today. I also did some shuffle boarding and hit some golf balls off the deck. The Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner. I felt honored and we had a wonderful time. He is a very attractive and attentive gentleman.



DEAR DIARY ... DAY FOUR

Went to the ship's casino ... Did OK . Won about $80. The Captain invited me to have dinner with him in his state room. We had a luxurious meal, complete with caviar and champagne. He asked me to stay the night but I declined. I told him there was no way I could be unfaithful to my husband.




DEAR DIARY .. DAY FIVE

Went back to the pool today and got a little sunburned. I decided to go to the piano bar and spend the rest of the day inside. The Captain saw me and bought me a couple of drinks. He really is a charming gentleman. He again asked me to visit him for the night, and again I declined. He told me that if I didn't let him have his way with me he would sink the ship. I was appalled



DEAR DIARY ... DAY SIX

I saved 1600 lives today. Twice.

Roxy Klein at 12:00:00 PM

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

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I keep hearing GREAT reviews on BORAT. I think we’re going to go see it in a couple of weeks after the crowds die down. If you have seen the movie, shoot me an email and let me know.

XOXO

Roxy Klein at 1:58:00 PM

Good Morning ~

After getting my cable back yesterday I had a bunch of things to catch up on.. I felt like pulling my hair out. Brett and I are going to take it easy later today when he gets home from work. Maybe order a huge pizza and zone out in front of the T.V.

Oh, bad luck is lurking at my front door. I broke ANOTHER Vibrator! I must be too rough with these things... AND my VCR Broke and I can’t get my porn tape out.. LOL… Yes I still have a VCR mainly because I still have some good porn on VHS and I haven’t transferred them to DVD yet. I’m about to take a screw driver to it to get that tape back!

Damn, some people are getting raunchier & raunchier…. Click

Have a GREAT Tuesday! XOXO

Roxy Klein at 9:02:00 AM

Monday, November 06, 2006

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How was everyone’s weekend? Ours was pretty uneventful till last night. We got ready for the game and grilled out… The food was fantastic. We had some of the best cheeseburgers ever and the game was rockin’ till “BLIP, GONE!” Our cable went out with 6 minutes left on the clock during yesterday’s game... Internet as well.

I have had it with Comcast!!!!!

You should have seen our faces when the screen went blank. It kinda went like this…

“WHAT THE FUCK??”

We both scrambled for the remotes. FUCK! All of the channels were blank. We call Comcast to ask what the hell is going on. She said they would have to send someone out “TOMORROW”

“Tomorrow? ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZy LADY?” Please stop joking around… Tell me your just fucking with us.

In her best operator voice “Sorry. That’s all I can do.”

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”

I wanted to smack the ever loving shit out of this bitch…. So now I have to wait on this fucker to show up and fix our cable. Eh, so we got the radio out and listened to the game only to find out that the foreskins won…. Talking about your bad luck…

Well we ended up getting some movies and watched MI3… Now surprisingly enough, that turned out to be a great movie. We were quite impressed… After the movie we decided to go to bed and HE decided to fuck the brakes off me! OH my, that was impressive. He didn’t seem to mind that the Cowboys lost after that and I SLEPT like a baby…

Roxy Klein at 12:45:00 PM

Friday, November 03, 2006

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Good Afternoon,

Geeze, it just seems like I'm waking up later and later. The cool air really helps me sleep.

I’m trying to get out of cooking tonight because of my upcoming weekend... Brett and I are going over to my brother’s house to have dinner Saturday and Sunday we have some friends coming over to watch the game. I’ll be cooking all weekend for everyone seeing how none of these people know what a stove is… LOL! Ugh, the things I do for love.

Well, I don't know how they wrote this with a straight face:

This was a real memo sent out by IBM to its employees. It went to all field engineers about a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite genuine.

The engineers rolled on the floor!

Especially note the last couple of sentences.

'If a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement. Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement Units).

Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by properly trained personnel.

Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the mouse.

Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop off method. Domestic balls are replaced by using the twist off method. Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge. Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately. It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction. Any customer missing his balls should contact the local personnel in charge of removing and replacing these necessary items.

Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an unhappy customer!

Roxy Klein at 12:47:00 PM

Thursday, November 02, 2006

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I haven't posted jokes in a little while so here we go...

Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day........


Congratulations on your promotion! Before you go... Would you like to take this knife out of my back? You'll probably need it again.

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My tire was thumping. I thought it was flat. When I looked at the tire... I noticed your cat. Sorry!

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Heard your wife left you, How upset you must be. But don't fret about it... She moved in with me.

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Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but wonder... "What the hell was I thinking?"

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I must admit, you brought Religion into my life. I never believed in Hell until I met you.

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As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am... That you're not here to ruin it for me.

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Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Tennessee , Kentucky & West Virginia )

Roxy Klein at 1:01:00 PM

GOOD MORNING!!! Or should I say Good Afternoon?

It was absolutely gorgeous weather last night so after a long day of work and chores Chris, Brett and I sat out on the porch telling stories about are youth and crazy shit that happen to us. Chris had some really great stories and had Brett and I laughed so hard we were practically crying! I am surprised that none of us pissed ourselves. Unfortunately I’m just a little hung over this morning because I didn't know when to stop.. Nothing that a little hair of the poodle won’t cure.. LOL!

Well I’m outta here for now… Have a great Thursday! XOXO

Roxy Klein at 12:47:00 PM

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

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Roxy Klein at 9:46:00 AM

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My Space
Roxy's Store
OH MY GOD
CSI Studios






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